is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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