Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize