she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Randomize
