Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
