i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
