I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
