My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
