Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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