home. puking in laundry basket.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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