I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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