It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
