; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
