No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
