Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
