Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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