How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i need an iv and a liver transplant
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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