The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
