Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
