Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Randomize
