Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize