if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
My first STD was from a foam party
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you win again, gameday.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
You're a waste of cheezeits
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Randomize
