Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
