Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Church boner. Awkwardddd
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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