Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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