The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
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