And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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