Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
