did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
