the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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