I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
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