At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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