so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
