Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
