Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry lionOFnola hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(989): View more from Michigan

i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.

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(619): View more from California

guys are not supposed to queef...right?

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(973): View more from New Jersey

well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown

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(303): View more from Colorado

Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.

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(248): View more from Michigan

Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.

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(317): View more from Indiana

Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window

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(615): View more from Tennessee

What are you doing tomorrow?

(1-615): View more from Tennessee

Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.

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