she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
