shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
