I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
