I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
