Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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