Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
