Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize