i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
