At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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