Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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