**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Randomize
