We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
