it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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