i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
