Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize