Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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