Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
