so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
My Sexting was not on an AP level
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
