You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize